- Hemingways_Shotgun@lemmy.caEnglish5 hours
14 minutes!? Who the hell has that kind of time in their day!? /s
- SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.caEnglish2 hours
in this economy? at this time of year? located entirely in your kitchen?
Can I see it?
5 hoursIt doesn’t take my wife 10 minutes from the first nibble on her neck, though, in 10 years i have learned where most of her buttons and switches are, find a new one still every now and then.
She really does have an awful lot of buttons and switches. Have you discovered the tucked-away rotary encoders, yet?
No, but i found a spot that makes her jump a foot in the air from her back, so i assume it’s hooked up to some hefty solenoids.
* Women reached the first orgasm in 14 mins.
Yeah, that was great, but we’ve got a few hours ahead of us here …
- ChexMax@lemmy.worldEnglish5 hours
All women are different, but my first is usually very weak. They intensify as they come (lol ;) ). I orgasm relatively quickly and then every few minutes after that. I expect a handful in a regular session, only 1 to 3 if it’s a quickie for him, like 20 or more if it’s a session for me.
When I’m with a partner where I don’t cum a lot (or at all), sex is a chore and I’m not really interested. With my husband where I almost always cum a lot, I have literally never said no thank you to sex in 6 years. I often wake him with a blowie to get things going.
So. I guess if you want to fuck a lot, we want many damn orgasms.
- Gonzako@lemmy.worldEnglish7 minutes
Yeah, on my first love it was the contrary to this. Making her orgasm was a full-day affair but when it came she’d nearly lose consciousness. She was perfectly fine with not having to orgasm for months but i’d defo tell her to make certain dates completely free.
As a man, I’m more curious about just how many I can get out of her. Don’t get me wrong, I’m looking to get off too, but I like to keep a stacked ratio, not quite a score but kinda. You kinda sound like you’re just out to get yours. Where’s the fun in that?
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish8 hours
I think my record has been 12-14 orgasms in a single session.
There’s a handful of fun benefits to being a cis woman.
Just for the record, post-op trans women can manage multiples very nicely too ;-)
(Sample size off two in my research)
- altphoto@lemmy.todayEnglish28 minutes
Ok, I think men can learn from this. So how? Did the before after op have anything to do with it? Or was that ability already with you?
Damn! I’ve got to assume that that likely wasn’t all PIV?
Like, I’ve been able to keep uh, full mast going through a refractory period, a couple of times, but… yeah, its not easy.
Usually gotta either give the little guy a bit of of break, use some other kind of stimulatory body part or tool… or basically find some position / situation where I’m effectively edging myself but getting her over the top.
Oh those work as well, I just… I guess I just think of them as ‘easy mode’, compared to doing kegels and such + using your hands/mouth etc.
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish6 hours
No, I don’t generally cum during PIV. Most women don’t cum from penile insertion alone.
In fact, there was no penis involved at all during that particular session.
That makes much more sense.
Yeah, whole lot of other erogenous zones and spots, everyone is a bit different as to how sensitive they are to which ones and which combinations of them.
I would have been extremely surprised if you were saying PIV got you to +10 orgasms, hence why I asked lol.
When I’m with a woman, my rough rule of thumb is that she should have orgasmed at least once before my pants are even off. Lost art of foreplay, and all that.
EDIT
But yeah, very broadly speaking, at least in my own experience, if you can find a PIV position where the clitoris is either being directly sort of smooshed or rubbed by the guy’s … i guess just ‘pubic region’, or the position is such that a free hand can also ‘massage’ the clitoris… tends to work better for the lady.
And also, there are specific erogenous zones in basically the rear of the vagina, anterior and posterior fornix, i think are the names? Some women have i guess you’d say ‘high sensitivity’ there, some have it at the gspot, some have it at both.
You’re right that for most women, those areas alone being stimulated isn’t enough, but, for some, it is.
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish4 hours
You’re right that for most women, those areas alone being stimulated isn’t enough, but, for some, it is.
Yep, most women need clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm. Most =/= all.
The way some men in here are throwing fits about women being able to orgasm without a penis is pretty funny though. How did any of you think wlw have sex?
Yeah I don’t know.
Porn exists where no men are present.
Vibrators… pretty common thing as well.
I… yeah I don’t know how anyone who has like, used the internet before, can somehow not understand how you don’t need a dick for sex to happen.
For me, typically 4 to 6 over about a 3 hour session (break for a quick drink and to use the loo included, I’m not 20 any more)
And the same for my wife, of course.
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish22 hours
That’s why you have a mouth and hands, potentially even getting your thigh in there.
Honestly, the penis in the vagina is sometimes the least exciting part about sex with that arrangement of genitals.
- squaresinger@lemmy.worldEnglish22 hours
Honestly, the penis in the vagina is sometimes the least exciting part about sex with that arrangement of genitals.
The same is true the other way round too. Which makes it all the more frustrating that a lot of women think their whole contribution to sex is to lay there and provide a vagina.
- msage@programming.devEnglish2 hours
Alright, the replies are crazy here. So what do you suggest then?
- squaresinger@lemmy.worldEnglish33 minutes
That (a) everyone educates themselves on how their body and the body of their partner(s) work, (b) that everyone educates themselves on how they can pleasure their partners (and optionally themselves too, why not) and © that everyone actively participates and contributes when they are having sex, all of that irrespective of gender or sex.
It’s ok to sometimes lay back and enjoy your partner running the show, but if that’s the case every single time, then you are doing something wrong.
- msage@programming.devEnglish31 minutes
I meant more like what do men like other than PIV or blowjobs. Just fishing for ideas.
- squaresinger@lemmy.worldEnglish19 minutes
Ah, gotcha.
Think of everything you like being done to you apart from PIV. Chances are that men like that too when you do it to them.
A woman being actually active, showing what she wants, using her hands both to touch her partner, but also to show what she likes (e.g. putting her hand onto his hand while he’s doing something she likes and pushing/holding the hand there) is incredibly sexy.
Being touched/stimulated on everything that counts as erogenous zone is nice.
Think of anything that counts as foreplay with women. Chances are men like that too.
To put it differently: Think of having sex, and the only thing your partner does is touch your clit and PIV, no other body contact. There’s a lot missing, isn’t there?
Communication is really sexy too. If you want something, say so. If you like what’s happening, say so.
Show that you are alive, in the moment, and there with your partner, not just waiting for the time to tick away while thinking about laundry. (Even if that’s not what you are, that’s what your partner might think you are doing if you minimize reactions and participations, and that’s decidedly not sexy.)
It’s really not so much about that secret magic technique or something, just about really being present, trying to find out what your partner likes, being happy to participate and experiment.
That said, look up “frenulum orgasm” if you want to surprise your partner with a secret magic technique that they themselves might not even know. It’s the male equivalent to a clitoral orgasm, and many guys have never heard of it.
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish25 minutes
all of that irrespective of gender or sex.
And yet you targeted women specifically.
- hirihit640@sh.itjust.worksEnglish19 hours
Yes, certain observations can be uncomfortable but that’s not a bad thing. It provides substance, for one, which your comment lacks
- protist@retrofed.comEnglish19 hours
First comment: “Conventional sex can be the least exciting part of sex.”
Second comment: “Yeah, so many women just lay there and contribute a vagina.”
You: “What an insightful comment!”
🤮
- squaresinger@lemmy.worldEnglish12 hours
No.
First comment: “My 30 seconds just isn’t going to cut it.” -> Clearly a man
Second comment: “That’s why you have a mouth and hands, potentially even getting your thigh in there. Honestly, the penis in the vagina is sometimes the least exciting part about sex with that arrangement of genitals.” -> Telling a man that PIV is not the only thing to do, but that he should be putting in more effort than just offering a penis
Third comment (my comment): “The same is true the other way round too. Which makes it all the more frustrating that a lot of women think their whole contribution to sex is to lay there and provide a vagina.” -> Telling women that PIV is not the only thing to do, but that it would be cool if they too put more effort in than just offering a vagina
Your comment: 🤮
- protist@retrofed.comEnglish9 hours
I’m sorry, can we read those back again?
First comment: “My 30 seconds just isn’t going to cut it.” -> Clearly a man
Second comment: “That’s why you have a mouth and hands, potentially even getting your thigh in there. Honestly, the penis in the vagina is sometimes the least exciting part about sex with that arrangement of genitals.” -> Telling a man that PIV is not the only thing to do, but that he should be putting in more effort than just offering a penis
No, that says “there are other ways to have sex than PIV,” it does not say "you should be putting in more effort "
Third comment (my comment): “The same is true the other way round too. Which makes it all the more frustrating that a lot of women think their whole contribution to sex is to lay there and provide a vagina.” -> Telling women that PIV is not the only thing to do, but that it would be cool if they too put more effort in than just offering a vagina
Your response to a woman saying “there are other ways to have sex besides PIV” is “it would be cool if women put more effort into sex.” You’re telling this to the woman who is saying there are other ways to have sex besides PIV. All she said was “you can use your mouth, too!” to the guy making a joke about lasting 30 seconds. Nowhere did she say anything about men at large. Do you think this is some competition between men and women so you had to throw in to say “no actually women are worse?” Do you genuinely not see how what you said in this context was totally uncalled for and sexist?
- hirihit640@sh.itjust.worksEnglish13 hours
Those sentences don’t connect, your reading makes no sense. Try this:
first comment: sex isn’t just about penetration
second comment: and yet a lot of women seem to think this, given how many just lay there
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish6 hours
There’s simply no way this man has slept with enough people to proclaim that most women don’t put in effort during sex.
- protist@retrofed.comEnglish17 hours
Their comment wasn’t gendered at all. Yours, however, went straight to being divisive and attacking women…
Edit: Lots of downvotes and no replies. Someone please tell me what I said you disagree with
- squaresinger@lemmy.worldEnglish12 hours
Yes, the first comment was gendered.
It replied to a man telling him that he should be doing stuff apart from PIV.
Of course, if you ignore the context, you can interpret it differently. But ignoring context invalidates any conversation in general.
- protist@retrofed.comEnglish9 hours
Please show me where she said “you should be doing something.” All I read is that she provided some other options for sex
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish5 hours
These men with their soft feelings can’t handle sex that is on equal footing.
I’ve topped more men in my life than these men have fucked women. I know what I’m talking about and it upsets them hahaha
- protist@retrofed.comEnglish5 hours
Hey now, don’t generalize about men or you’re doing the same thing that rude dude did lol
Speaking as a man, it’s not soft feelings leading to this, but deep insecurities, often totally subconscious
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish5 hours
Fair enough, I missed a word in the first sentence: “These** men”
He took great offense to idea of sex being more than a penis being inserted into a vagina. It says much more about him than anything else I’ve said here.
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish22 hours
What a disgusting comment to make to me. That’s not the inverse of my comment at all.
Have you tried making the sex better for them by chance? You’re really telling on yourself here.
- squaresinger@lemmy.worldEnglish12 hours
What a sexist comment.
- Man does everything when it comes to sex.
- Woman says “Sex is your responsibility”
- Woman doesn’t want to contribute at all.
- Man makes woman cum every single time for the last 10 years.
You:
It’s your fault, because you are a man and complaining about a woman not putting in effort is sexist.
Of course you didn’t know any of what is actually happening, but because I’m a man, you instantly assumed that I must be doing nothing. That is incredibly sexist of you. Check your privilege.
- sidelove@lemmy.worldEnglish21 hours
Not for nothing, but the tendency for people who get along purely by being conventionally attractive to starfish isn’t like, a secret. Lack of effort isn’t really a gendered thing.
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish21 hours
My comment wasn’t talking about people who exhibit a lack of effort with sex.
There’s a lot that goes into why a person may starfish during sex and, maybe surprisingly to you, a lot of it is rooted in lack of sexual education and/or sexual abuse.
- squaresinger@lemmy.worldEnglish12 hours
To check your prejudices, please complete these two sentences:
A man who doesn’t take care of his partner during sex is …
A woman who doesn’t take care of her partner during sex is …
Selfish and probably not even enjoying themselves, certainly not enjoying their partner.
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish8 hours
Not all men have penises and not all women have vaginas, you can actually go fuck yourself.
My comment wasn’t talking about people who exhibit a lack of effort with sex.
- squaresinger@lemmy.worldEnglish12 hours
a lot of it is rooted in lack of sexual education
True. And who’s job is it to educate a grown woman on sex? Are you so sexist that you think women can’t be responsible for educating themselves?
- velma@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish7 hours
You’re literally talking to a woman who puts in effort with sex. Enough to know there’s a lot more ways to try to please someone than shoving your dick inside and calling it a day.
You’re certainly not qualified to teach anyone about pleasing others in bed.
- backalleycoyote@lemmy.todayEnglish20 hours
How to prepare a frozen pizza for two:
Place pizza in oven➡️sexy time➡️orgasm➡️pizza is ready➡️enjoy!
I literally just did this last night lol it was a great time.
You may have to adjust those times if you have a convection oven.
If I let my oven get to 425, it cooks a pizza in less than 10 minutes.
- backalleycoyote@lemmy.todayEnglish20 hours
14min is the average, so perhaps the secret to a successful relationship is finding a partner who you can climax with in the time it takes to bake your favorite pizza.
- ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.deEnglish17 hours
Look man. We’re gonna follow the directions, and we’re cooking a Tombstone. Not no damned tostinos.
