It does federate for sure but implementation looks quirky.

https://piefed.social/c/[email protected]

How else would you engage in a foreplay with your laptop?

I have ThinkPad at work which is pleasant enough to touch due to rubberised plastic but wanking with it sounds tricky because of how stiff it’s hinges are.

Does that make it legal? Cool.

They mean Microsoft Access.

There’s Kodi in WebOS brew appstore. I’ve only ever used Kodi for offline media libraries but as far as I know there’s plenty of third party Kodi addons for this kind of piracy.

I rarely pirate stuff on Mac but I’ve had this saved in my bookmarks: https://www.torrentmac.net/

More obscure stuff might not be well seeded but I haven’t found anything better.