• Okokimup@lemmy.world
    2 months

    I told a coworker once that m&ms were my kryptonite and she went and gave me a huge bag of them. I don’t think the average person understands what kryptonite is.

          • Droechai@piefed.blahaj.zoneEnglish
            2 months

            When he did need a fake tooth extraction he used his heat vision to puncture the sedation gas tube to drug the dentist

            • nomy@lemmy.zipEnglish
              2 months

              That seems incredibly unsafe, is Supes qualified to administer the gas?

              • Droechai@piefed.blahaj.zoneEnglish
                2 months

                Worst part is that he only wanted it to fake medical procedures as reinforcement for his Clark Kent persona. This was when he was in school (iirc, i read the comic from my fathers collection as a child) so couldnt possibly have gotten any qualifications for sedation yet

                Edit: I think it was golden age supes, iirc he also faked bad eyesight and a broken arm in the same comic. Anyone else knows which story Im recalling? Which one was it? He was planning to send a robot for any later dentistry appointments which lacked the tooth

    • Ricky Rigatoni@retrolemmy.com
      2 months

      Saying something is your weakness is common to say it’s something you enjoy so much you can’t help yourself.

    • lath@piefed.socialEnglish
      2 months

      Forbidden pleasure that you’re too weak to hold back from.

    • thermal_shock@lemmy.worldEnglish
      2 months

      She was hitting on you, kryptonite makes you weak in the knees and vulnerable for her to attack.

    • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      2 months

      Wouldn’t it be you who’s using the word wrong? Or do M&Ms literally make you weak/kill you?

      • 4am@lemmy.zip
        2 months

        I mean, they do. They’re not exactly there for the nutrition.

      • Okokimup@lemmy.world
        2 months

        They’re not good for you, and I can eat a family size bag without stopping. So yeah, they make my resolve weak and lead to premature death.

        • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
          2 months

          And you eat the bag without stopping because you really like them… So clearly she understood exactly what you meant.

    • Björn@swg-empire.de
      2 months

      You now are locked in a wicked battle of the wits with your own personal nemesis.

      • sbv@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
        2 months

        Damnit. I always wanted a nemesis and this Lemmite just casually picks one up with a throwaway comment.

        • FluorineBalloon@programming.devEnglish
          2 months

          That… That sounds exactly like something my arch nemesis would say! Someday you shall face the wrath of… The Procrastinator!! Mwoooohahahaha!

          • sbv@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
            2 months

            I see. A nemesis who waits to strike from the shadowy future.

            I won’t stand for it! I’ll stop you before you even start, Procrastinator!

    • gustofwind@lemmy.worldEnglish
      2 months

      The average person is actually illiterate like in a legitimately does not understand language beyond a 5th grade level kinda way

  • unrealMinotaur@sh.itjust.works
    2 months

    As always, there is an XKCD for this (#3123, Cannon)

    Title Text: Achilles was a mighty warrior, but his Achilles’ heel was his heel.

  • nocturne@slrpnk.net
    2 months

    It was posted to Peter Explains The Joke and the poster was banned for it.

    (The blacked out area is an ad)

  • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.worldEnglish
    2 months

    Superman has never died from Kryptonite but he has died from getting punched in the face by a big dude with boney hands.

  • OmegaPerseidTwitch@piefed.socialEnglish
    2 months

    I know the person was either actually dumb, or trolling, but reddit really bams people for nothing. That’s why I’m here not there.

    • hayvan@piefed.worldEnglish
      2 months

      This one seems to be bammed for a valid reason though.

      • OmegaPerseidTwitch@piefed.socialEnglish
        2 months

        Because Reddit has no sense of humor, and should the case be this person actually doesn’t know reddit chooses to be dicks instead of helpful? Nah. I reported Reddit for the pedophilia pictures found on there daily and left anyway. The mods pretend to be gods, the site is run by a CEO who is a pedo, and it is just a trash site. Even honest questions get you banned. Asking why you got banned gets you site wide banned. I can keep going but the bottom line is this was not a valid ban reason.

        • guy@piefed.socialEnglish
          2 months

          I think the banning was hilarious and a sign of humour

          • boonhet@sopuli.xyz
            2 months

            And also not banned by reddit but a mod of the specific subreddit.

            Also is it a legit ban or just a comment? I haven’t seen this version of the reddit UI before

  • ThatGuy46475@lemmy.world
    2 months

    Lana, these crabs this time were not my fault, this whole place is

    You were going to say lousy with them

    I was, until I realized that’s

    Where the expression comes from

    • WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world
      2 months

      Lois could never have Superman’s baby. Do you think her Fallopian tubes could handle his sperm? I guarantee he blows a load like a shotgun right through her back. What about her womb? Do you think it’s strong enough to carry his child?

      The second she gets a suntan the kid’ll kick right through her stomach. The only person with a uterus strong enough to carry his child is wonder woman. That or he wears a kryptonite condom, which could kill him…