• TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world
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    12 hours ago

    In all seriousness, as a guy, I am genuinely gobsmacked at how many men feel entitled to sex and blame their insecurities and lack of dating skills on women. Looking back, I’m glad that I came from a culture where it’s more egalitarian. The schools I went to taught us that feminism is about equality between men and women. It’s not about one gender being superior to the other. When I was younger, my mom repeated to me couple of times not to get upset if a woman rejects me, to the point I told her she keeps saying what I already know before.

    Later, as I got older, I realised that feminism and gender equality is taught differently in different places, or barely taught at all. Many people mistake feminism as female superiority. Some families don’t teach treating the opposite gender with respect. Even here in Europe, despite the progress since forever, I find Europeans still have more rigid gender expectations than in Southeast Asia.

    Sometimes, being born into what family and the environment you grow up in is a matter of luck and shape who you are. Despite my parents’ flaws, I’m lucky I was born to educated parents and our culture is more or less egalitarian despite some hiccups.

    • littlewonder@lemmy.world
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      5 hours ago

      Sometimes it’s a willful misunderstanding of feminism.

      A strawman they’ve built in their heads from the words of their tv news preachers enables them to continue to hate women.

      Listening to actual feminists and taking a minute to understand how it benefits everyone is hard and means they might have to stop feeding their delicious hate.

    • Karl@literature.cafe
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      12 hours ago

      Where do you come from, if you don’t mind me asking. Because your birthplace sounds AWESOME

      • TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world
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        12 hours ago

        I don’t want to say specifically where I’m from, but I am originally from South East Asia. A common theory for the relative gender equality is because of the sea-faring, nomadic culture of Austronesians, who populated South East Asia and later the Pacific. Apparently, because of the lifestyle and constant movement, the workload is distributed between men and women, which promotes egalitarianism. Similar thing is observed on Native Americans and hunter gatherer cultures. I don’t know how solid the theory is but I will have to read more on it.

        Even with South East Asia now being a “settled” society, and Abrahamic religions introducing some patriarchal ideas, the egalitarian value still largely remains as far as I can tell. There is remarkably more women in management roles in South East Asia compared to other countries. Many Westerners even noted how there are many female security guards in my home country.

        • ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works
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          8 hours ago

          Being generic here, but the concept of Hijra is not controversial or unaccepted across SE asia, correct? Or at least to the best of my knowledge (Cambodia and Burma).

          I tend to pose just having such uncontested language goes a long way for gender roles (and conformance) not being such a puritanical binary like it is in the American anglosphere.